As a single parent I moved forward blindly in my child rearing. Many times it felt like I was feeling my way around in the dark. Most of the time I didn’t know what the heck I was doing. Love was my motivation in every decision I made, even when that decision wasn’t met with cheers and whistles. Sometimes the outcome was good and sometimes it wasn’t. As a single parent I had no significant other to discuss things with. I learned early on that as parents we just do the best we can in any particular moment and hope for the best outcome.
My children are grown now with family’s of their own. Every now and then I get a gift in the form of a compliment from one of them. It comes in the form of a childhood memory that I may not even remember, but they do, and they share it with me. It comes in a lesson they learned that I taught them that really made an impact on them. It comes in the loving gentle way they treat their own family and the “thank you” I get every once in a while from one of their spouses.
In retrospect, maybe it was better to have been alone fumbling around blindly trusting my own instincts. Maybe that was my lesson.